Conversations with MIL

Oh Man was I pissed yesterday

Sean came home and when he saw how upset I was he said well lets go see your aunt. So I got to see her. I really wanted to go for my Uncle and cousins. They are doing everything for her that they can. They said they don't think brain damage is a big concern. They are mostly concerned about her heart. Hopefully she will be ok. 

I plan to go there to be with them as much as possible

After we went to the hospital we ran by the IL's house. They live right around the corner from the hospital. And MIL and I had a conversation. It started like this: I overhear her in the kitchen asking sean to stay with the kids because she wanted to talk to me (Que the awkward)

She sails into the room I am sitting in and sits RIGHT next to me and grabs my hand with both of hers.

MIL: I wanted to talk to you because we haven't really talked since you were in the hospital and I wanted you to know I am here for you and you can talk to me any time.

(the awkward deepens)

Me: Oh thank you. Yes I know.

(Then she starts getting emotional)

MIL: Sometimes when things happen people run for the hills and I realized I did that to you. People were just gone after my mom died.

(Genuinely feeling for her)

Me: You did not do that. I know you are there for me.

MIL: And I want you to know that I love you and I am sorry when I have hurt your feelings. I am apologizing for past and future.

Me: I know when you say things that bother me you are just trying to help.

MIL: Are you sure? Because I really am. I am a mom and that is all I know how to do

Me: Yes. (and then I told her that it doesn't bother me when she gives us her opinion it bothers me when she keeps telling us over and over)

And that was way too long but not even close to the things we were able to talk about. She said she was going to work on not forcing her opinion. And we talked about a lot of things that made me feel so much better. I had decided that if it ever cam up in conversation I would tell her that about the forcing of opinion. I didn't want to bring it up on my own because I didn't want it to feel like an attack and she is very sensitive.

I get annoyed with MIL but I know that she is not a bad person. She has redeeming qualities. And she wants to help. But things add up after a while. And it gets hard to deal with stuff. 

I really hope she meant what she said. Because it would help our relationship a lot. 

I can't wait till Wednesday to tell Nancy about all of this. 

I don't need apologies. I only want bad behavior to stop. As soon as it stops I am good to move on.